Life and Dreams

Doubts have taken power over me this week, I want to believe that I will be successful really badly. But somehow there is still this doubt that I will fail. 

Jackie Cruz came to RIT like two weeks ago and she told the story of her success, how she made it to Orange is the New Black. I identified so much with this individual. She had a similar background as me, was born in Dominican Republic and then moved to the states. She struggled as she chased her dream, got conned by a con artist, and almost died in a car accident. But she made it and she ended up doing what she wanted to do.

 

Jackie Cruz

Jackie's story filled me with motivation, I went home that day and believed that I could do it, that I could succeed in the entertainment industry. But time passes and I forget, I forget and go back to having doubts. Support is something that I lack I feel like I get more support from those who do not know me than those who do. This is something that Safaree, Nicki's ex boyfriend pointed out in one of his Instagram posts. this is often the case people who do not know you will want you to succeed more than the ones that are around you. Goes with the saying "They want to see you do good, just never better than them." 

Scene of Orange is the New Black. (Jackie in the middle)

As I have stated in past posts I am attending college, majoring in International business. Everything that I am learning now I implement in what I am trying to be.For example in my business and ethics class we listened to a radio podcast about a car dealer ship. In this podcast the narrator gave the traits that made the best car salesperson the best. He noticed how this sales person did not want to sell cars, he needed to. It was almost like an anxiety relief for him to sell cars.The salesperson would make a sale he would be happy for a few minutes praising what they did, but then that person would be upset again. It was almost like he forgot what he just had accomplished and he needed to sell more to feel good. I think that if we want to succeed in any industry not just the entertainment or music industry we should all think as this person. You don't just have to want it, you need to need to succeed. This is something that i found extremely interesting and I think that it is something that we should all implement if we want to be successful. 

Everything that I am learning, is not just being applied to the industry, but it is also being applied to my own life and my own goals. We should all think this way, even if you are not in school, applying everyday lessons to your own career is key. As far as my doubts go, I think I will always have them but looking past those doubts and staying focused in what you want to do and what makes you happy will be the only way in which you can prevent those from coming true.  

 

Fame

A lot has been on my mind this past week. I started to think about how different life is when you become famous. I watched a few YouTube videos and then came across a video of Amanda Bynes. Amanda is a former Nickelodeon star who starred in iconic shows like "All That" and "The Amanda Show". I particularly loved her show "What I like about You" Which was a show that she starred in a bit later as a young adult. Amanda made the 90s kids laugh with her different characters and crazy stunts that she would do in the shows that she participated in.

Although she portrayed these crazy characters in her shows, she was a well behaved collected individual. In this interview with Showbiz they ask her questions about her personal life she talks about never going to rehab, not doing any drugs and still living with her parents even after she became famous.

After this interview She was arrested for DUI's, complaints of smoking marijuana in the lobby, she threw a bong out of a 36th floor window after the cops came into her apartment. In another occasion She started a fire outside in a garbage can at random property. After she started the fire her dog was covered in gasoline, so she went into a grocery store to try to wash the dog off. This was all caught on camera. 

Amanda was also caught shoplifting, and was dismissed from the gym for showing weird behavior. She then decided to attack celebrities on twitter, calling people ugly and twitting about personal experiences that should not be talked about in a tweet. TMZ actually released a voice video that they bought from their roommate, of Amanda having a private conversation with him and saying that she wanted to kill her father. 

This is paparazzi footage after her breakdown and issues with the law, she seems out of it and is on the "phone" the whole time, asks the paparazzi to stop asking her personal questions but answers them. She keeps throwing up the peace sign says she "Hates her father wish he was dead and that she is a multimillionaire" 

All of this got me thinking about how extreme living as a famous person is. All the cameras people following you around and having no sense of privacy. It made me think about how much my life is going to change when I become famous. Yes when I become ;). For a minute it made me question everything and I asked myself if this is really want I want, people following me around and asking me personal questions that I may not want to answer.  Going through a public breakdown and people knowing everything that is going on. 

Her situation also got me thinking about how much she had changed as a person and what could be the cause of this. Was it fame, was the drugs or an actual mental illness. This has not been the first time that we see young stars take this route teens like Linsey Lohan, and Britney Spears went though similar situations. Amanda's case is more shocking because she specifically stated that she will never become that. 

I then saw this other video and it was extremely sad to me how she has to hide her face and constantly ask paparazzi to leaver her alone. I think that Amanda is right and this should be illegal, the video hows a man constantly trying to take a picture and asking for a shot that she does not want to give him. 

Being famous has its perks but it also has its downside, depending on the persons personality if acquired it can be fun or it can be extremely annoying. Depending on how you handle yourself and how much money one has, you can stay under the radar. Artists like Jay Z and Beyonce have managed to stay under the radar though occasionally you might see them going through this. Amanda's situation definitely made me think twice about what I want to do, though my passion for music is bigger than this. It does not change my mind about my career goals however it did open my eyes to what might be headed my way in the near future. 

My Current Situation

Quick pic before performing

As I talked about in my first few posts I am in love with music and everything that relates to it. I write and produce my own songs and eventually I want to be part of the music industry and have a large audience who listens and enjoys my music. I am also a full time college student, currently taking 18 credits which makes it extremely difficult for me to write. I have a few projects that I have on hold because I have not had the time to write. Currently I am working on changing my brand, people tend to associate me with Nicki Minaj. Dont get me wrong I love Nicki and I am flattered that anyone would compare me to the queen of rap but like I stated in one of my previous posts it is important to have your own brand.

I decided that since I am bilingual I would incorporate my culture into my songs and that is what I have been doing. I made it so that I switch from English to Spanish and Spanish to English, this is something that not a lot of people are currently doing which puts me in a different category. By doing so I am also appealing to a different target audience, the culture that like me enjoys Spanish music but was raised in New York or a English speaking environment and likes to listen to both.

I am Dominican so Dem-bow is something that I love to listen to, I want to start incorporating that into my music as well. This will create a different brand for myself and set me aside from what others are doing. However at the moment college is preventing me from writing any new material, when I do have the time to write i feel liberated, like all the weight that i have is lifted and i am able to write it all down and let it all out. I encourage anyone who is passionate about the music industry to pursue it, music is the only thing that keeps me going at times of distress.

Amber Rose's Slut Walk

Blac Chyna and Amber Rose 

Amber Rose former stripper and ex-wife of Rapper Wiz Khalifa, staged a "Slut Walk" in LA on Saturday. The concept of the walk is to spread the message that women should not be sexually assaulted because of the way that they dress.  It all began when a police officer told the media that "Women should avoid dressing like sluts in order not to be victimized." After this statement women from Toronto got together and took their outrage to the streets. They dressed in provocative clothing to spread the message that women should not be judged by the way that they are dressed. In this walk women dress with very little clothing and hold up signs that talk about women empowerment.

Before the walk Amber released a video called "The Walk of No Shame" to promote the slut walk. The video features Amber walking out in the streets and people applauding her for having a one night stand. The video also shows children encouraging this type of behavior, one of the kids asks his mom "Mom did that woman get f***** last night." Which I found extremely outrageous. There was also a man in the video who tells Amber "Your an inspiration to my daughter." This was another part of the video that filled me with confusion. I understand the concept of women being empowered and promoting that women should not be victimized because of the way that they dress, however I feel like this video went completely left and distorted the real message that should be getting across.

Amber gets Key to the City for having a one night stand. 

            Promoting one night stands and including children in the video is not what we need right now. Teens need to be educated about protecting themselves from sexually transmitted diseases that can be passed down if you are not careful. I understand the concept of the slut walk, but do not agree with the fact that Amber is promoting girls to have one night stands. In hip hop we tend to promote this type of behavior all of the time, encouraging violence and sex to teens that are growing up and are ignorant to consequences. We have to stop condoning this type of behavior and start encouraging positive things to our youth.